I'm not sure if my thoughts on this one are coherent since the whole mysterious sickness/growing insanity loses me a bit. I also read this at 3 a.m. I am extremely intrigued with the idea of Zero eventually becoming the one who puppets Suzaku's war, and the inescapable guilt Suzaku feels in the midst of things but knows he cannot have it any other way. And how Suzaku just can't end the war without having Lelouch make that concession first. As well as the idea of Suzaku unable to distinguish among himself, Euphie and Lelouch at this point. The letters lost me because while they were tragic and revealing of Lelouch's mentality, I think they may have been more strongly served and present without the reader actually seeing them. I know this stands in defiance of the "show don't tell" rule of writing, and I only wish I could better defend my reasoning. I do like how the sex is portrayed so it's both the greatest lie and the greatest truth the boys have at this time.
I absolutely adore this: He likes to believe his time with Lelouch is nothing but a rightful sacrifice in the name of a more peaceful world. He believes it hard enough, but it is always Lelouch who shatters his carefully woven lies and shows him this has nothing to do with sacrifice and everything to do with selfishness. A selfish love of two lost children who have nothing else to cling to but each other. Lelouch, who even in his deepest raving madness seems to get some perverse pleasure in showing him his worst side, the side which is still capable of loving him. I just love the dichotomy it shows about Suzaku's true character.
I also find irony in that the fic describes Suzaku as Lelouch's inspiration since as the drama CDs show, as a child Suzaku actually indirectly encourages Lelouch to care about himself for once and not just the ones he loves (mainly Nunnally). As fake!Suzaku is all about focusing on others, I think this viewpoint is a good nod to the more inwardly-focused true!Suzaku that is presented post-23. And yes, I have to comment on the cute of the mini-Arthurs. The boys need a family of kitties.
I think the thing I like the best about this fic is how cruel it is because it manages to balance a forced tranquility with the harsh reality of war and madness. What the boys have will always be broken, but that is truly the only way it can ever and will ever work. It's just a matter of whether they're willing to make that sacrifice, that acquiescence.
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I absolutely adore this: He likes to believe his time with Lelouch is nothing but a rightful sacrifice in the name of a more peaceful world. He believes it hard enough, but it is always Lelouch who shatters his carefully woven lies and shows him this has nothing to do with sacrifice and everything to do with selfishness. A selfish love of two lost children who have nothing else to cling to but each other. Lelouch, who even in his deepest raving madness seems to get some perverse pleasure in showing him his worst side, the side which is still capable of loving him.
I just love the dichotomy it shows about Suzaku's true character.
I also find irony in that the fic describes Suzaku as Lelouch's inspiration since as the drama CDs show, as a child Suzaku actually indirectly encourages Lelouch to care about himself for once and not just the ones he loves (mainly Nunnally). As fake!Suzaku is all about focusing on others, I think this viewpoint is a good nod to the more inwardly-focused true!Suzaku that is presented post-23. And yes, I have to comment on the cute of the mini-Arthurs. The boys need a family of kitties.
I think the thing I like the best about this fic is how cruel it is because it manages to balance a forced tranquility with the harsh reality of war and madness. What the boys have will always be broken, but that is truly the only way it can ever and will ever work. It's just a matter of whether they're willing to make that sacrifice, that acquiescence.